Nerd alert: I just spent five minutes explaining to Wendy why this is such a obscenely huge deal.
(also, holy shit, that guy is auctioning off some insane shit. Original packaging art, a shitton of GIJoe and He-Man, and some honest-to-god Raiders of the Lost Ark props. Crazy.
Brief Review: "The Dark Knight" - HOLY SHIT THAT WAS AWESOME.
That being said, Heath Ledger died because Bill Hicks's ghost came back and said MOTHERFUCKER YOU STOLE MY SHIT ALL OVER THIS MOVIE. Because seriously. Heath Ledger IS (uh was) Bill Hicks AS The Joker.
Bring on the sequel with David Tennant as the Riddler and Patton Oswalt as The Penguin.
Hey, nerds!
How many of you are going to Tim's wedding? I know the wife and I are planning on it, and Gabe and Alan, but what of the rest of you? Wendy and I are looking at airfare, hotels, etc. and our decision on where to stay is directly related to how many of y'all are coming and where you are staying.
So Wendy and I were watching Colbert, and this ad comes on that's clearly local. It's shot on video, and it's this 30-something black guy and he's trying really hard to be cool. He tells us that a lot of churches today have turned god's message of love into a message of hate - complete with pictures of GOD HATES FAGS signs and the world trade center. Then he says that god is all about love and we need to get back to that, at which point he introduces his pastor friend, a kind of doughy white dude, and they invite us to come to their church, which they bill as THE TRENDIEST, FRIENDLIEST, MOST RADICALLY INCLUSIVE WORSHIP EXPERIENCE IN ATLANTA.
I start laughing and suggest we go. We have the following conversation -
Me: "We should totally go to that and see if it's as hip as it claims."
Wendy: "How much is it?"
Me: "Uh... it's a church, it's free."
Wendy: "Really?"
Me: "Yeah, that whole 'paying for a seat at the temple' thing is very much a jewish thing - in fact, I could probably come up with quite a few inappropriate jokes about it."
Anyway, out of curiousity, Wendy pulls up the church's website and is looking at it, and goes "oh my god... this guy has the southernest name ever - his name is DONNIE EARL PAULK!"
And then I start laughing.
Earl Paulk founded one of the biggest (and first) megachurches in the southeast, not too far from here. Said church has been rocked by quite a few scandals lately, mostly involving Earl Paulk, the founder, telling various ladies of the congregation that God wanted him to fuck them. The biggest bombshell, though, was that acting pastor, D.E. Paulk (oho!) was not in fact Earl Paulk's nephew... but his illegitimate son.
No wonder they're trying really hard to rebrand themselves.
Also - Why was I not notified about That Thing That Happened on last night's Daily Show?
So I'm seriously thinkin' bout some 360 action.
HELP ME DECIDE: this package looks pretty good, but so does this one. Either way, I gotta put down for the wifi adapter. So - two controllers and two older games for $385, or drop an extra $20 to get the same console, same controllers, and GTAIV.
WHAT TO DO.
(also - the plan would be "no more toys this month, max $50 or so next month" or similar and the remaining budget would be almost enough, barring, again, the wifi adapter.)
Heh.
I just had a brief conversation with someone from the classic rock station here in town about how they have seen a big upswing in people whose 8-12 year old boys are really into their station and say it's their favorite... because it's all the songs they know from Guitar Hero.
Heh.
So I've been playing around and crunching numbers lately, and I've come to the shocking realization that toy collecting is a fucking expensive hobby. Since the line dropped (which is to say "in the past year") I've blown about $380 on 25th Joes (and current estimates suggest I can look forward to spending another $200 or so over the next couple of waves).
Similarly, I'm looking to put down $400-ish to have a "complete set" of Animated (i.e., one figure of every show character in a size I deem suitable) but that's including stuff that isn't officially announced yet, and don't get me started on Universe (hint: about $350, based just on stuff that we know is coming out).
What this means is that if I go out and buy the shit I've been planning on buying, I can look forward to dropping a fucking grand on toys in the next 9 months or so. When you put it in a figure like that, it sounds way more fucking ridiculous than it does as $10 here and $15 there. Jesus christ. That's easily enough to buy a 360 and quite a few games (i.e. "Rock Band, Rock Band 2, and a shitton of songs, plus GTAIV"). That's enough for a pretty decent new laptop (I've flirted with the idea - it's probably a bad one. I really don't need to be playing TF2 from the comfort of the couch).
That's almost enough to get the driveway repaved.
This is one of those "being an adult" moments, isn't it? Don't get me wrong, I get a lot of enjoyment out of my plastic crack, but at the end of the day, they just take up space and I generally get my money's worth of enjoyment within a few weeks, at which point they're hyperarticulated reconfigurable paperweights. Still, compared to a movie ticket, a robot is a pretty decent fun investment - for ten bucks, I get a week's worth of entertainment, at least.
On the other hand, I'd never have to shovel rocks out of the driveway again.
On the other other hand, FUCKING MIGHTY MIGHTY BOSSTONES IN ROCK BAND 2.
I may have to drink on this for a while.
So Walky posts all kinds of toy reviews in his LJ and I briefly wanted to talk about a toy I reconnected with recently, the GIJoe Armadillo.
What, exactly, is the purpose of this thing? If the figure to vehicle scale is right, it's about the size of one of those big commercial lawn mowers they use in parks, baseball fields, etc., but covered with armor and bearing down on you with four 20mm machine guns that apparently store their ammo in Magic Happy Fantasy Land 'cause I don't see anywhere for ammo boxes, an engine, a fuel tank, a drive train AND an operator to go in that thing. Plus, it's got an open top, which makes it totally pointless for the sort of light urban operations the packaging and related media seemed to suggest it was for - one IED (hell, one well-placed molotov) and it's out of commission.
That's when I realized it. The GIJOE Armadillo is basically the GIJOE Go-Kart. The machine guns are completely fake (again, no place to store the ammo that isn't retarded, like "right on top of the fuel tank") and probably made of PVC pipe. To go any faster than an electric wheelchair, the armor plate pretty much has to be fake, too. So what you've got here is basically a golf cart cosplaying as a tank.
That being said, it's EXACTLY the right size for a little kid to play with, you can push it around with one hand and turn the turret with ease, making it just the thing to scoot across the floor, gunning down Cobra troops and shooting at Serpentor or jets or the dog or whatever. Maybe that's how the Joes use it too - THE POWER OF IMAGINATION.
Two things:
What do I spend my time thinking about when out driving around?
DREAM ROCK BAND SONG PACKS:
"90's One Hit Wonder Pack"
"Banditos" - The Refreshments
"Brimful of Asha" - Cornershop
"Flagpole Sitta" - Harvey Danger
"In the Meantime" - Spacehog
"You Get What You Give" - New Radicals
Also: DOCTOR WHO SEASON FINALE - HOLY SHIT THAT WAS BRUTAL. It was also fanwank of the highest caliber. Just throwing around all kinds of fanwank and shoutouts and handjobs and whathave you. It was pretty insane and kind of retarded in an awesome way.
TWO THINGS:
1: WHY WAS I NOT NOTIFIED THAT YOU COULD BUY THE MAGIC HAT FAMILY OF BEERS IN NORTH CAROLINA?! GODDAMNIT! (I just picked up a six of #9 and the Summer Sampler pack. Score!)
2: Fire Pro Wrestling Returns is insanely awesome. Fedor kicked the shit out of AJ Styles and Rampage punched Andre the Giant so hard they stopped the bout. Awesome.
please be real please be real please be real
ETA: I AM A 20 YEAR OLD STUDENT AT GEORGIA TECH. I AM LOOKING FOR A GIRL OR WOMAN TO TEACH ME HOW TO FRENCH KISS. PLEASE EMAIL ME. HERE IS A PHOTO.
WENDY IDENTIFIES THE VARIOUS INCARNATIONS OF DOCTOR WHO: "Crotchety Grandpa Doctor," "Old Doctor," "Debonair Doctor," "Scarf Doctor," "Celery Doctor," "Jewfro Doctor," "Question Mark Doctor," "I don't know this one," "Leather Jacket Doctor," "Current Doctor."
Not bad for someone who's only seen the current run and a single Troughton serial (The Mind Robbers, which was... weird). Note that Wendy was VERY irritated with Zoe. "She was stupid. And useless. 'Doctor, what's through this door - AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAUGH' SHUT UP STUPID BITCH."
I liked The Mind Robbers because it had a dude in a muscle suit and some INCREDIBLY BAD FIGHT CHOREOGRAPHY.
Man, you buy one little Revoltech and spend a weekend putting him in hilariously campy poses, and pretty soon you want to order a bunch more. (Seriously, Revoltech Megatron is awesomely flaming. He has JAZZ HANDS and everything. He holds the "one hand on hip, one hand cocked coquettishly" pose astonishingly well.)
JULIA/CHARLIE (and anyone else in-town, for that matter): What do you think about eating here? Looks good, sounds like a hell of a fun time.
We're back. Trying to adjust to east coast time, driving, etc. again.
Navigate: ( 20 older orders)
